“If I wanted to date, it would probably be you.”

There is a whole lot of hooplah in my apartment complex right now. It’s 10:05pm. And it sounds like children. I don’t care if tomorrow is a holiday! This is ridiculous.

Long time, no update. Things with the ex have been going really well. After my last post, he didn’t come spend the night. Wow, that was ten days ago. Time flies. Anyway, he was gone all weekend and I stayed busy. On Monday night, I had been texting trying to get my money order situation figured out. He was holding my $1,000 money order that my other real estate agent had given him, and I was trying to work out the details with the ex about how I would get it. He seemed really difficult, so I just decided I’d drive down and pick it up from him. I was still really put off by his comment that he spends all of his free time with me, so I made sure to tell him that I wasn’t trying to hang out and I really just wanted to grab the check. He said, “It’s fine if you want to stay and hang out, but I’ve had a bad day.” I said, “No thanks, just need the check!” I met up with him at a pub where he was watching the Braves game and he was being pissy. I asked what was up and he said I was being weird since I didn’t want to hang out. I stayed and chatted for about an hour with him. I think I cheered him up about his bad day at work. Went home that night and worked a bunch the next few days.

I must have seen him at some point during the week, but I’m not sure when. My days all mix together since I’ve worked so insanely much. I think it was this past Thursday. We had been texting Wednesday night and were both horny, but I was exhausted and he was masturbating. Hm… When he got over to my place, he came up behind me and was kissing me. Then we were talking about sex and he made some comment about not wanting to date me (the mood was really playful). I sort of joked about how him making comments about not wanting to date me doesn’t get me in the mood to want to have sex with him. He was like, “I told you… It’s not that I don’t want to date you, it’s just that I don’t want to date. When I’m ready to date, it’s probably going to be you.” I mentioned briefly that I don’t want him to think that if we date, we’re going to have to move in together right away (/take things way too fast). I said I like how things are and don’t need much more. That night he was drinking Jack and Cokes and was kind of drunk, and he laid his hand in my lap twice and then moved it after about a minute or so. He spent the night that night but again, we both worked the next day. I think I went to bed before him, too.

I wasn’t really sure what the hell was going on because he has been so adamant that I just want to be friends with him! How can he tell me that I need to think of him as just a friend and that I should date other people but then he tells me that when he’s ready to date, it’ll probably be me?!

He invited me out to his roommate’s birthday on Friday night. This is the 21 year old girl (well, now 22) that I got a little jealous of earlier on. I was really surprised since he seemed to be so against me meeting her before and I asked him about a million times if he really wanted me to go. He said he wouldn’t know anybody and just wanted to stop in to say hey. I agreed to come down when I got off work and go with him, as long as we kept it short since I was working Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. I went to change at his place on Friday and then we went to meet up with Roommate and her friends. They ended up going to a different place, so the ex and I had sushi together first. Then we went over to meet up with Roommate and her twenty friends. Roommate and Roommate2 were both there (Roommate2 is a 33 year old Asian girl). They both ran up and hugged me and were so excited that I was there. Roommate2 kept asking the ex when we were getting married and how could he be so stupid. Hah! It was so good to hear! Even if I’ve only met them both in passing, I really liked that they pointed it out to him (cause even if they don’t really know much about us, they’re still right!). The night, the ex briefly put his hand on my lap on the ride home, but was quick to move it again. When I dropped him off, he kissed me goodnight and then got out of the car and laughed and said, “I know! I’m not supposed to do that!” He was also kind of drunk, though.

Another what the fuck.

Saturday I ended up getting off work at noon unexpectedly (thank god!). I met up with him for lunch since he was on his way up north for camping. Lunch was good. We laughed a lot and then we parted ways. Definitely no mention of the kiss and we didn’t even hug goodbye after lunch. He ended up getting lost trying to camp and came back over Saturday night around 8pm. I had spent the day downtown with a friend, but it was kind of nice to have him here, even though I kind of wanted to catch up on trashy TV shows but the one TV in the apartment goes to Braves when he’s here. Oh well. He ended up falling asleep around ten, so we went to bed early…

And that’s where we stand. Our tickets to Rome are booked, so that’s happening. We planned to go to Nashville together in a few weeks, but are canceling cause it’s during the CMAs and neither of us like crowds. I feel good about things… While I don’t read too much into the kisses and getting touchy on his part, I do think he’s starting to think more about “us.” I use that really loosely. I think he still wants to be single and is very aware of that. But I think that subconsciously (especially when having a few drinks), that side of him is starting to come out, too. I’m still okay with giving him his space. Still don’t want him to feel rushed into anything. I have kissed him goodbye on his cheek twice when I’ve left for work, but since we talked the ten days ago, I don’t touch him other than that. I don’t sit by him on the couch at all. I haven’t been calling him to ask him to hang out. He’s actually been the one to initiate us hanging out every time, I think. When he touched me, I left my hands where they were. No trying to put a hand on him when I sleep… I’m keeping my distance, just like he asked for. I’m still happy and still really don’t know exactly where things will go.

Anyway, time to go relax… Just thought I should keep you all updated!